Sexual addiction is often defined as a persistent and escalating pattern or patterns of sexual behaviors acted out despite increasingly negative consequences to self or others.
Some out of control repetitive behaviors, which may reflect sexual addiction include:
Masturbation
Simultaneous or repeated sequential affairs
Pornography
Cyber sex, phone sex
Multiple anonymous partners
Unsafe sexual activity
Partner sexualization, objectification
Strip clubs and adult bookstores
Prostitution
Sexual aversion
How sexual addiction resembles other addictions:
Brain chemistry changes are similar.
Family background of addiction.
Lack of nurturing and other forms of emotional, physical or sexual trauma in childhood.
Multiple addictions can co-exist.
The treatment focus is the same involving counseling, peer to peer support, accountability groups. (this is a very personal process).
Here are some questions to ponder if you believe that sexual addiction is an issue in your relationship?
Have you ever thought you needed help for your sexual thinking or behavior?
That you’d be better off if you didn’t keep “giving in”?
That sex or stimuli are controlling you?
Have you ever tried to stop or limit doing what you felt was wrong in your sexual behavior?
Do you resort to sex to escape, relieve anxiety, or because you can’t cope?
Do you feel guilt, remorse or depression afterward?
Has your pursuit of sex become more compulsive?
Does it interfere with relations with your spouse?
Do you have to resort to images or memories during sex?
Does an irresistible impulse arise when the other party makes the overtures or sex is offered?
Do you keep going from one “relationship” or lover to another?
Do you feel the “right relationship” would help you stop lusting, masturbating, or being so promiscuous?
Do you have a destructive need – a desperate sexual or emotional need for someone?
Does pursuit of sex make you careless for yourself or the welfare of your family or others?
Has your effectiveness or concentration decreased as sex has become more compulsive?
Do you lose time from work for it?
Do you turn to a lower environment when pursuing sex?
Do you want to get away from the sex partner as soon as possible after the act?
Although your spouse is sexually compatible, do you still masturbate or have sex with others?
Have you ever been arrested for a sex-related offence?
If your partner answers 5 or more questions as a YES, more qualified professional screening will be necessary to determine his level of sexually compulsive behavior.
There is HOPE for YOU and your relationship! Recovery is POSSIBLE!
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